For RP purposes, I am in the belief that it depends on the couple. The one general point of view with Elven relationships was/is that it is for life (this being the surface elven view). Natually there are always cases that totally go the other way, in that partners were changed as often as the winds change (RP wise). Logic says that the courtship ect would reflect the twos background and upbringing and maybe depending on how close to their society they are/were, aka a Grey elven couple might follow their own peoples traditions and the same for the other races of elves, yet if either or both of the couples background was more tied to being with the edan or humans then logic might lead one to see them following edan ceromony.For the most part elven cultures that are desribed in books/manuals are mainly guides, something to compare ones (the players) outlook to and give some boundries on how far one wishes to portray their Elf.
Drow on the other hand, the female was in charge and if the male did not keep her fancy so to speak found a new "toy".
YN of Malas